Abortion and the rule of Christian fascists

Many have written more eloquently than I that forcing women to bear children against their will, to the detriment of their health, and against medical advice stands in contrast to all that we thought we understood about America and the freedom she offers.  

Now we are subjects instead of the Christian Taliban - where one very misogynistic Christianity will decide the moral direction of this country.   No new programs will be offered to provide support for the unwanted generation to come - instead untold human suffering is cast upon us.  Disproportionately affected are the working poor, the uneducated, the young.  

I was that uneducated girl from a working-class family.  In my last year of high-school, on an evening free from a part-time job, I went to a party.  I was flattered an older boy (in his 20s and out of school) took an interest in me.  But later, when I was alone, unable to summon strength to make him stop, telling him no, and finding myself in a dream-like drugged state I was full of shame, rage, self-hate and loathing; for I didn't even know the boy's real name - he went by an absurd nickname - and I never saw him again.  I was raped and pregnant and my dreams of college and escaping my small-town life were in serious doubt.  I was confident my parents would not support an abortion so I sought out the method by which a minor could gain court-approval for the process without parental consent.  I drove an hour from my home to meet with the judge in chambers and explained that my parents would want me to give birth to this child. They would not condone an abortion.  Even then I stood at the crossroads and explained to this old white man that tethered to this rape baby I would have to give up pursuit of college.  As it stood, my parents were not supportive of my talk of college - I only felt inspired to dream in this direction after listening to friends who were college-bound.   I shed tears before that judge that day.  I begged him not to make me have that baby.  I told him I was not ready to have a child.  

At the time I was angry that I had to go to the judge to get permission - I should have been able to make the choice free from his benevolence.  Now I shudder for the girls for whom there is not even this option.

My request was granted and I had an abortion well within the first trimester.  I felt relieved, renewed, and grown-up in a way I had not been before.  I learned about birth control from the clinic, and made sure to keep my appointments so that I could always prevent pregnancy.  My mother had never spoken a word to me about these topics prior to this.  

Approximately two years later I met my future husband.  He was attending the University and I the community college, but my college-bound friends were at the University and it is through them that we met.  I can tell you with certainty that we would not have met, courted, or married had I had a baby.  In fact we were together for around 13 years before we decided to try to have a baby of our own.  When we did try to get pregnant I had two miscarriages before bringing my son to term.  It turns out that I had fibroids and as a result am very prone to miscarriage.  I may have had a miscarriage if I had not had an abortion - but I have no regrets about my choice.  

Abortion is a choice for the woman who must decide.  It is dependent on the circumstances and context at the time.  I have never faced with the choice a second time, but I would never presume to know what is right for any other woman in any other context - I would want her to have freedom to decide her future.  The arrogance of the few to make this decision for so many is wrong.  I fret for my daughter and all young girls who might be forced to shoulder a burden for which they are not ready.  I cry for the unwanted generation who will be alive but without the support to live.  

This week the federal ethics guiding womens' health have turned violent.  The Supreme Court doesn't care about women or their health, 22 states have decided to restrict womens' freedom of choice.  Misogynist policies will force women to have babies even if their health is at risk.  70% to 80% of the population is against this decision, but the powerful few will decide for us all.  Women - this is only the first blow - prepare yourself.  The Christian Taliban knows where the woman's place is and what the woman's role should be. You can fully expect that they will continue to move in this direction stripping us of our rights and freedom as they see fit.