Abortion and the rule of Christian fascists

Many have written more eloquently than I that forcing women to bear children against their will, to the detriment of their health, and against medical advice stands in contrast to all that we thought we understood about America and the freedom she offers.  

Now we are subjects instead of the Christian Taliban - where one very misogynistic Christianity will decide the moral direction of this country.   No new programs will be offered to provide support for the unwanted generation to come - instead untold human suffering is cast upon us.  Disproportionately affected are the working poor, the uneducated, the young.  

I was that uneducated girl from a working-class family.  In my last year of high-school, on an evening free from a part-time job, I went to a party.  I was flattered an older boy (in his 20s and out of school) took an interest in me.  But later, when I was alone, unable to summon strength to make him stop, telling him no, and finding myself in a dream-like drugged state I was full of shame, rage, self-hate and loathing; for I didn't even know the boy's real name - he went by an absurd nickname - and I never saw him again.  I was raped and pregnant and my dreams of college and escaping my small-town life were in serious doubt.  I was confident my parents would not support an abortion so I sought out the method by which a minor could gain court-approval for the process without parental consent.  I drove an hour from my home to meet with the judge in chambers and explained that my parents would want me to give birth to this child. They would not condone an abortion.  Even then I stood at the crossroads and explained to this old white man that tethered to this rape baby I would have to give up pursuit of college.  As it stood, my parents were not supportive of my talk of college - I only felt inspired to dream in this direction after listening to friends who were college-bound.   I shed tears before that judge that day.  I begged him not to make me have that baby.  I told him I was not ready to have a child.  

At the time I was angry that I had to go to the judge to get permission - I should have been able to make the choice free from his benevolence.  Now I shudder for the girls for whom there is not even this option.

My request was granted and I had an abortion well within the first trimester.  I felt relieved, renewed, and grown-up in a way I had not been before.  I learned about birth control from the clinic, and made sure to keep my appointments so that I could always prevent pregnancy.  My mother had never spoken a word to me about these topics prior to this.  

Approximately two years later I met my future husband.  He was attending the University and I the community college, but my college-bound friends were at the University and it is through them that we met.  I can tell you with certainty that we would not have met, courted, or married had I had a baby.  In fact we were together for around 13 years before we decided to try to have a baby of our own.  When we did try to get pregnant I had two miscarriages before bringing my son to term.  It turns out that I had fibroids and as a result am very prone to miscarriage.  I may have had a miscarriage if I had not had an abortion - but I have no regrets about my choice.  

Abortion is a choice for the woman who must decide.  It is dependent on the circumstances and context at the time.  I have never faced with the choice a second time, but I would never presume to know what is right for any other woman in any other context - I would want her to have freedom to decide her future.  The arrogance of the few to make this decision for so many is wrong.  I fret for my daughter and all young girls who might be forced to shoulder a burden for which they are not ready.  I cry for the unwanted generation who will be alive but without the support to live.  

This week the federal ethics guiding womens' health have turned violent.  The Supreme Court doesn't care about women or their health, 22 states have decided to restrict womens' freedom of choice.  Misogynist policies will force women to have babies even if their health is at risk.  70% to 80% of the population is against this decision, but the powerful few will decide for us all.  Women - this is only the first blow - prepare yourself.  The Christian Taliban knows where the woman's place is and what the woman's role should be. You can fully expect that they will continue to move in this direction stripping us of our rights and freedom as they see fit.  

Another public school experience is over...back to homeschooling

I really wanted the kids to make it through the school year.  There were so many times when I questioned my decision to put them back into school - specifically this small rural school with unqualified teachers.  I could make a long list of weird things the teacher said to the 7th grade that were actively hostile towards public education, science, and diverse thought, but it's exhausting and embarrassing to list all of these things and realize that I didn't make this decision sooner.

What ultimately pushed us over the edge is was the fact that Brother's mental health was suffering.  For weeks he was lying in bed at night stressing out about death.  He was keeping us all up because his anxiety was so high he could not fall asleep and wanted to be comforted.  We encouraged him to practice thankfulness, meditation, deep breathing...but it was not helping.  We has many conversations about how he was (or was not) fitting in and making friends at the school.  We were pushing him to be open-minded with these kids with different values and we tended to blame him for his lack of friendships.  One night over dinner his thoughts and feelings exploded from deep within.  He said, "why would I want to be friends with these kids who vandalize the bathrooms, do drugs, talk about suicide, are "emo," and depressed?!? I don't want to fit in with these kids!"  Then he went on to tell us about the morbid culture that exists in his class where students played a "game" asking a kid to consider two of their classmates and decide who they would "save" and who they would "kill" (if they HAD to kill one)  He was matched and killed by a number of his classmates.  Only one saved him.  When he was asked to match two kids he said, "neither, I would never kill anyone."  Of course that is the right answer, but no other kids gave it.  He then went on to share that one of the kids in his class said, "I would murder everyone in this class if there were no consequences."  The teacher was in the room during this game and did not stop it.  Well suffice it to say that was the end of that.  He didn't go back to school the next day - instead I wrote to the admissions staff and let them know we would resume homeschooling.  

F-that.  I can't put my kids in this environment anymore.  When we homeschooled (and now that we are doing so again) we look around the world to find ways to learn from our experiences.  Yesterday there was a Preparedness Fair in town of St. Johns.  We went and I told Sister that next week she will have to write me a paragraph about "what is a Preparedness Fair?"  I told Brother that he would right me an essay about those things that he learned about that were very useful and those that are more questionable (I want him to have a good bullshit detector).  Everything is a lesson if you frame it in that way.  Though this is the attitude I had towards the school experience, safety concerns trump all of that.  

My kids are generally positive, caring, giving and open with those around them.  They observed the opposite in the kids at school.  It's understandable.  In this rural community some of the kids only eat when they are at school.  Many parents are under or unemployed.  One girl's family was making money selling pigs by the side of the road.  It's a very poor rural community and I knew that going in.  I didn't expect the death cult aspect of it.  However if your life sucks that bad I suppose you are looking forward to the afterlife.  

I want to build mentally healthy kids - not beat them down with a  continual depressing exposure to the absolute worse side of rural America.  Even Sister in second grade had a sad experience with making connections.  Here she is, innocent, loving, caring - each day coming home from school making cards, bracelets, notes for teachers and other kids.  She talked continually about one girl who she said was her bestie.  When that girl's birthday came, Sister wasn't invited.  It was soul-crushing.  The little kids used profanity regularly and, one day on the bus, Sister was told by an eighth-grader that she doesn't have any friends.  Many of these rural kids live hard lives and taking out their shit on my little sweeties was becoming a past-time for them.  Yes, I want my kids to deal with adversity, but let's be real - in the adult world I would not spend 2 minutes around such shitty people.  Why force kids to continually interact with a hostile crowd?  

So here we are.  Homeschooling once again.  I'm not sure what the future holds, but today I am glad to have my kids close to me again and to protect them from all attempts to drag them down into the muck with the sad and downtrodden out there.  They will have plenty of time, as adults, to have to deal with all that.  At home we can reflect upon why people act that way while making sure that they have good mental health.  

Sunrise...sunset

 

The Eastern sky is brilliant each morning as I return from taking the kids to the bus stop.  The school year is nearly halfway over.  My kids are fully vaccinated now, Husband and I both got our boosters, and we have all avoided contracting COVID-19.  I was able to give a presentation about COVID-19 vaccine science to the middle school.  I shouldn't have been shocked by they conspiracy theories existing in the community and voiced through the questions of children - but I was.  At least I presented the public health viewpoint for their consideration.  It is probably the only time most of them will hear it.  

Despite my training and understanding of science.  There is something almost spiritual that I continue to feel about this pandemic.  Let's face it - humans have only microscopic predators and humans are a plague on the resources of mother Earth.  In the US we approach 800,000 deaths from COVID-19 and the virus is not done evolving.  We are under attack.  

This weekend the Earth waged further war on humanity through ever more natural disasters, a cluster of tornadoes across six states in December.  Humans are going to have to start paying the debt we owe to nature - we need to plant trees, take less, live with a lighter imprint.  Our expectation that the Earth is a never-ending Giving Tree is folly.  We need a new ending.

The sun is going to continue to rise and set on this planet - whether humans will continue to witness it or if mother Nature will send us the way of the dinosaurs seems to depend on whether or not we can learn that we are not separate from Nature, but part of it.  

Each setting sun reminds us that the day is over and a long cold December night is near.  We have stored up the sun's energy so that we can live in the illusion of day long after the sun has set.  We burn wood to ensure we are warm when the temps drop below freezing.  These are gifts of nature to live in comfort when the outdoors are harsh.  But do we treat these moments as gifts or do we expect that we are entitled to these comforts as the supreme animals we thinks ourselves to be?  

Off-grid Thanksgiving

Well, we had a beautiful Thanksgiving.  I was very grateful for the sun so that I was able to warm up our pre-cooked turkey in the solar oven (I ordered Thanksgiving dinner from Safeway).  I added the turkey at around 9:00 a.m. and took it out at around 3:00 p.m. when the sun oven was not keeping as high of a temp.  Most of the day it had no trouble keeping around 350 degrees. 

When I temped the bird in the afternoon it was around 155 when I really needed to be 10 degrees warmer.  At that point we transferred it to a large pot and put it on the wood-burning stove.

I put the lid on it an it simmered there for about an hour until the temp was around 170.  The rest of dinner I ordered from Safeway was easy to warm in the microwave.  I also made a Brussel sprout and sweet potato side dish.  Dinner was amazing.

For the four days off we stayed home, played a bunch of Minecraft with the kids and just enjoyed our place.  It was relaxing and free from acquisition anxiety.  We certainly observed Buy Nothing Day.  

I was able to make a soup with the turkey carcas - it turned out really well.  I also baked a loaf of wheat bread in the solar oven.

There is a lot to be said for being thankful for the land, the sun, family and the homestead.  It was a lovely holiday!

Delta for all

Given enough time we will all be exposed to COVID-19.  Right now the Delta variant is circulating, but tomorrow it may be a new variant.  Given what we know today - some of us, the school-aged kids, will probably recover.  The oldest community members, those over 85, make up only 2% of the population, but account for nearly 30% of the deaths.  It's not a good time to be elderly in the US.

Living in rural America brings many challenges, not least of all trying to remain compassionate and understanding when people around you share misinformation like they are observing the weather.  No masks and low vaccination rates in rural America has led to a death rate two times that of the cities.  The consequences for the rural populations are there, but they are unable to connect the dots because their thinking is chaotic, gullible, prone to group-think, and reliant on their social networks.  

The chart above shows the 7-day death rate per 100,000 population.  That is important because it is comparing rates, not actual numbers.  The green line represents rural America.  The purple line is the urban parts of the U.S.  The blue line is all of American put together (there are more people in cities that in rural areas so it more closely matches the urban line).  

A new report shows that in Arizona COVID-19 has been the leading cause of death since the beginning of the pandemic.  NO OTHER STATE has had such terrible outcomes.  The deaths can be tied directly to policy decisions made by the Republican-led state government.  Across the nation COVID-19 is the third leading cause of death.  The chart below compares Arizona to two other states which are more typical of the national average.  You can compare policy decisions on masks, vaccinations, social distancing, school reopening and find Arizona did virtually nothing to protect the public.

But taken a step further the U.S. is failing miserably when compared to other countries.  Here is a comparison of death rates across countries.  Sure there are countries that are worse than the US, but wouldn't you think in the richest nation in the world - where we feel we have our shit together...?  I mean, Iran, Russia, Turkey have lower death rates than the US.

I guess today I am very upset by our failures because my mom has stage 4 terminal cancer and she was exposed to COVID-19 though one of her grandkids (who caught it at school of course).  I don't know what the future holds, but I do know we are all going to get this shit.  You just better hope you are young enough and healthy enough to survive, because we aren't doing shit as a society to keep each other safe.  We absolutely have lost the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness because we are dying at rates we have never seen - nearly 800,000 deaths in the US and no end in sight.  

This message brought to you by your jaded, exhausted, and sad public health doctor.

Updates from the Rancho

We are 1/4 of the way through the school year.  We have avoided COVID so far and are very thankful.  I was really hoping for immunizations for the kids by this point, but I think we will have to wait a bit longer.  The kids both had excellent reports for their first quarter (not that I am surprised) - but there have been definite ups and downs when dealing with that school!

I don't think I mentioned the addition of our newest family member, Zuko! (Yes, Avatar: The Last Airbender fans here) We brought him home at the end of June when he was about 3 months old.  He is now six months and he has grown a lot!

The shelter said he is a pit bull / red heeler mix.  I think he is also a bit hound mainly because he howls and points!  He's a very sweet guy and we are glad he is part of the homestead.  He keeps me company during the day when the kids are at school and Husband is at work!  Today he chased cows off of our land for the first time.  I also think having him around is keeping the rodents at bay - I see less evidence of them near the house these days (our house is rodent-proof, but we would see droppings around the house fairly often until Zuko joined us).  

We have had a record-breaking monsoon season here. The rain has made our trek in and out of here difficult on occasion - the non-county maintained roads get so muddy!  Just last week we had a crazy thunderstorm that brought inches of rain and a lot of hail over a very short period of time (maybe a half hour or so). It certainly feels like fall now!

The system looked so ominous as it was moving in our direction.  We received severe thunderstorm alerts on our phones from the National Weather Service.  When the hail pounded our building it was SO loud and I feared for our skylight, but everything was fine - even though the water was pooling on our patio more than I had ever seen it before.  It looks like winter in this picture, but this was the first week of October!

     

Over the past couple months the rain has also brought out the beauty of the area.  The wildflowers and grasses have made for some beautiful high plateau scenes.

 

I wish I had the right camera to photograph the night sky because it is like living in a planetarium here.  Last night there wasn't a cloud in the sky and the stars were so bright - it was really stunning.  

The pronghorn have been hanging out on our land quite a bit.  It's fun to wake up and see them grazing and running around our house.  

We've also seen lots of cool looking spiders.  The most common are huntsman and tarantulas.  Both are good to have around as they eat other bugs and are not a threat to humans.  

In other, non-nature news, a downside to living on dirt road is that we have gotten quite a few flat tires.  We replaced our truck tires with all-terrain tires at the beginning of the summer and we have not had any problem with them since then.  However we recently got a flat on our Highlander and had to drive way more than I wanted to on the donut.  I tried to get the tire fixed, but it was not possible.  Then I tried to purchase all-terrain tires but there were not in stock anywhere so I had to order them.  In the end we had drive back and forth to town on the spare.  Our truck has a full-size spare and I just don't understand how an all-wheel drive "trail" vehicle comes with a donut!  We ended up ordering the all-terrain tires and then buying a new rim and keeping one of the old tires.  We purchased a rack so we could mount the full-sized spare on the roof of the vehicle.  I am really happy with this fix.  I don't think I will ever drive a vehicle without a full size spare living out here!

Another drama that I had to deal with recently was that I had a fitting bust on one of my underground pipes.  Our storage tank was almost empty and we were lucky not to have burned out our delivery pump - but for some reason I checked on it just in time and realized there was a problem.  I spent one afternoon and the next day digging up the pipe and fixing it.  It may not look like much, but without it we had no running water in the house!  Thankfully our irrigation tank was full so we were able to fill buckets to flush the toilet use water indoors.  I was also very thankful that I had everything I needed for the fix here - saving me a trip to town!

A project we recently completed was to insulate and drywall the last bit of exposed metal inside the building.  Husband also installed two new outlets - one outside and one on the new wall.  This was something we have been wanting to finish for a while.  Here is the "before" picture...

The after picture was taken before the paint even dried!  I hadn't even put the electrical plate back on - but you can see the huge difference!  We were loosing a lot of heat out of this corner last winter.  It is now well insulated, has a functional outlet, and it looks much better too!

I am thankful that my work hours are very flexible, because I have been able to manage these projects and continue to work full-time!  

We are getting ready for some cold weather to hit us next week.  The lows will be below freezing for a couple of nights so I had to insulate the exposed outside hot water pipes again.  The insulation I put on last year sort of deteriorated in the weather and was finally ruined by cows.  Today I wrapped the pipes and taped them up good with an all-weather tape. I LOVE the Sunbank water heater!

We've purchased a couple of loads of wood over the past months and today husband cleaned out the stove pipe from last season and chopped wood in anticipation of our first fire of the season.

Even sister helped by gathering kindling! 

It is certainly getting cooler - it's been in the 40s at night.  However, if it warms up to the 70s during the day (which it has) the house will hold the heat overnight pretty well.  Right now it is 49 degrees outside and 71 degrees inside without using the wood-burner.  However when it dips into the 30s and 20s at night (with highs in 50s or 60s) we will need to build a fire!

I hope you have some beautiful views and great adventures!  Being close to nature is good for the mind and body.  I'm loving our homestead life even when we have flat tires and busted water pipes.  The best part about challenges is overcoming them!  Today we are all healthy, safe and have everything we need right here on our tiny slice of the American Pie.  Life is good!

The public school experience v. homeschool

There are so many benefits of homeschooling.  For our family the flexibility in scheduling has been so important as we traversed the United States.  We have also enjoyed the flexibility in choosing literature, social studies and science topics that are relevant to what is going on in our lives and the world.  There are many great resources out there and we have drawn upon many curricula to ensure our kids are caught up to, or beyond, their grade levels.  As one example we read The Giver and liked it so much that we continued with the quartet even though we didn't have a curriculum for the other three books.  However we really enjoyed reading and talking about the books together.  

Beyond flexibility in scheduling and curricula are the many intangible benefits of having your kids around for all the messy parts of adulting (solving problems, working through issues, being frustrated with fixing things, cleaning, organizing....).  When your kids are with you they learn from you in everyday activities, commentaries, etc.  They also do chores - Brother does all of the dishes (we have never had a dishwasher) and Sister puts the dishes away and matches socks.  They do these chores every day when they need to be done.  They take care of the cat and help with the RV when we are traveling.  Keeping the kids home also gives us more of an opportunity to be with them during these fleeting years between birth and late adolescents.  We purposely reduced our expenses and reduced the number of hours we needed to work so that we could devote our time to our kids.  It has been wonderful on many levels.

The downside is that our kids end up being isolated from people who don't think like us.  They also have few opportunities to solve their own problems away from us.  As Brother approached 7th grade I started to think about the young man he was becoming and the skills he was strong in and those where he needed opportunities to develop.  It is true that kids will not develop their own set of problem-solving skills with other people without practice.  For a middle-schooler this is increasingly important - for each person has to decide how they will approach and deal with the world.  Also, let's not kid ourselves, the 20-21 school year was lonely for many kids.  Our homeschooled kids, who looked forward to social outings and friend-dates, were more isolated with us than ever.  They need some friends their own age.  We can be parents and teachers, but it is really not in me to play at a 7-year-old or 11-year-old level (nor do I think that it would be beneficial for them).  

So at the end of their 6th grade and 1st grade years we started talking about whether they would be interested in going to school.  The timing was right for our family on another level.  Husband graduated with his software engineering degree in May and he wanted to put the degree to use and re-enter the workforce.  With him taking a full-time job and me working from home it would have been possible, but difficult, to continue to homeschool.  Thankfully the kids were keen on the idea....but public schools bring their own set of challenges and though we are on the third week, I feel I have run a marathon of stress and worry about the whole thing.

First, we are attending a small K-8 school, census is around 170 students.  It is a frontier area (very rural) and I knew the area was conservative.  I reached out to the school to ask about COVID precautions and explained my background and education in public health.  The administrator was very approachable and asked me to speak at the assembly on the first day of school and to write an educational letter to parents about masks.  In AZ the governor has banned mask mandates.  Small schools really have no choice but to follow the governor's guidance so masks are optional at our school.  I did write the letter and I did speak on the first day.  It didn't matter.  My kids are the only ones in their classes wearing masks and they are sick.  Sister became sick a week ago and I took her for strep and COVID testing at that time (both negative).  Since then Brother became sick so we went back for testing again today mainly because we were notified yesterday that there is a confirmed COVID case in the school.  It's so infuriating to send them into such an unsanitary environment every day when this disease can be prevented with minor planning and masking.  It is only because I teach statistics and understand the risk of the illness in kids that I send them (risk to kids is still small).  There shouldn't be a school in the nation without a mask mandate in place during these times.  

Secondly you would not believe the shit people say in that school.  Teachers talk about conspiracy theories with the kids like they are talking about the weather.  The most common is that Biden "stole the election" from Trump.  I went to a Lutheran K-8 so I am used to teachers spreading unverifiable claims, but I thought public schools were supposed to remain focused on approved curricula!  I am so proud of Brother.  The goal of this experience was for him to engage with people who think differently - that has been a mission accomplished!  

There are some benefits - the school has an excellent music teacher and Brother is learning viola and ukulele this year.  Sister will learn violin!  Certainly this is beyond what I could manage in homeschooling.  The school provides free breakfast and lunch to all kids everyday.  This is certainly convenient for me.  The kids have small class sizes - Brother has 13 students in his and Sister has 18.  Small class sizes facilitate more engagement with peers and the teachers.  We learned that we have neighbors with kids (one the same age as Sister) and they ride the bus together. We wouldn't have known about the kids on the homestead off in the distance.  

With all that said I question my decision to engage with the public school every day.  I want to stick it out because the kids are happy (albeit sick right now).  I guess I will see how the COVID tests turn out and continue to play it day-by-day!

The will to annihilation

I am surrounded by a community that is anti-mask and anti-vaccine.  They think mandates in relation to masks and vaccines are a violation of individual rights despite recommendations from the medical community.  The same people who espouse these views turn to medical personnel & hospitals for their own health.  But they feel they know better in this situation.    

As I have previously mentioned my education is in public health.  What is public health? Public health is the science of disease prevention.  Regarding COVID-19 we have TWO main choices.  Best choice is get vaccinated (this will prevent you from getting severe disease) and wear a mask (to prevent the spread to those who cannot get vaccinated - such as children under 12).  

Yet here are things that have recently been said to me in person and via FB:

"I have done a lot of research on masks and they don't do anything." - neighbor

I am sure the 'research' done by my neighbor was peer reviewed, right?!?  I pointed out that there were ZERO cases of COVID-19 in the school last year when masks were required...so they probably worked, right?

"More people have died from the COVID-19 vaccine than COVID-19." -friend of a FB friend

When asked for proof they were unable to provide it - it just feels right to them.  This is absolute fiction.

"The vaccine is a way for Bill Gates to reduce the population of the globe." -friend of FB friend

?!?!?!  Asked for proof, got some lunatic video that took multiple Bill Gates interviews and cut pieces of them together in a crazy way.

"...trust your "science" and leave me alone." - friend of FB friend

My science??  The same science that you rely upon every time you have a serious medical concern?  The same science you have and continue to benefit from every day of your life?  The same science that has enabled you to rant crazy to the world through the internet?

I've tried to reason with people, I have tried to find areas of agreement.  I continue to point out that the vaccines were developed under Trump's Operation Warp Speed.  No matter - the memes and conspiracies have all the power right now.  

I will note that the above group of people are all very religious - they have faith that they will be ok.  They have more faith in memes and pseudo-science than in actual science (though I feel confident they would choose to go to a hospital if they were sick).  But underlying all of this distrust of fact is a will to annihilation.  Many religious people are actually wishing for the end of days. 

Like me many people look around and see that our systems have let us down and that it is difficult to pursue life, liberty and happiness.  Unlike me they want it all to end.  They don't give a shit about the climate, or their neighbors, or even themselves.  They know we will all die and they are fine if that death comes sooner rather than later.  They feel confident they will be rewarded for their choices in the afterlife.  But I imagine they will spend many more lives seeking to learn the lessons they failed to learn in this life.  The lesson is this - life is precious, fleeting, and wonderous and it should be valued.  We should work together to promote the health of our communities and the planet.  We should seek to act with love and compassion in our hearts, not spite and vengeance.  We are all connected.  To quote the Bible, "Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it." (1 Corinthians 12:27)

Their views are the antithesis of Christ's - they act out of fear and anger towards others who are different than them.  Christ washed the feet of the whore, clothed & fed the sick and needy.  He looked for ways to help those who suffer.  "...whatever you do to the least of my people you do unto me." (Matthew 25:40).  Science gives us a path to reduce suffering and they shun it.  Who are these religious people who hate knowledge, science and the reduction of suffering? .  They are acting out of a will to annihilation - their values corrupted by our greedy, consumeristic, disposable culture.  

Where conservation (conservativism) should be it is replaced with the myth of endless consumption.  Where community & family should be it is replaced with extreme individualism, xenophobia, isolation, fear and hate.  Our "Christian" culture glorifies violence when Jesus only taught love.  

Perhaps these are end days - but if they are it is because of the anti-Christ values of individualism, hate, intolerance, violence, and destruction.  Where we see opportunities to help each other we should do it.  Wearing masks is a small sacrifice for your neighbor.  If you are so firm in your belief that you don't need anyone - then please don't frequent the hospital and overburden the medical professionals when you get sick.  

Perhaps you can find some love for your fellow man and the planet that sustains you.  Perhaps you can embrace the message of Christ instead of the false gods of violence & ego.  Today, right now, you can be a different person and promote less suffering instead of willing the annihilation of yourself and those around you.  

Self-reliance and rural living

When you hang around people accustomed to city life, be they conservative or liberal, there are certain things taken for granted and certain stereotypes bestowed upon those in rural areas.  I have moved between these worlds during different chapters of my life.  I want to provide some context about my experiences prior to sharing the insights I have gained from these variations of America.  Today I am writing from our Apache County homestead.

I've been fortunate to live in owned homes most of my life.  I lived in rented units for perhaps 1.5 years during college and during transitions (moving). I have never lived in the inner city where it is very densely populated (like in New York) - where condos or apartments are the norm for housing.  I have lived in a condo - multi-unit dwelling - for about 4 years during college, but we owned it.  During the time we were full-time RV'ing we paid lot rent (meaning we didn't own the land, but we did own our RV).  Our longest term lot rental is in Mesa, AZ in a manufactured home community.  Many of the manufactured homes are rented and there are a number of full-time RV sites sprinkled throughout the community. Here is the view from our window into our neighbor's yard.   

The first 10 years of my life I lived in a neighborhood with fenced city yards dividing property lines of houses right next to each other.  Our back yard bordered a public elementary school parking lot.  The next 9 year my family moved to a rural setting.  We could see our neighbors, but there was nature between us.  For some years we had a larger piece of land (maybe an acre or more) and it bordered state land - all woods.  From there we moved closer to a rural village.  The houses were still very spread out, but they were slightly more dense. Here is a picture of camping in the woods in Michigan. 

When I moved out of my parents' house I moved in with Husband and we lived in East Lansing, MI to attend college.  I think this was the most dense urban setting I have ever experienced.  In 1997 we moved to Arizona - to the megalopolis that makes up the greater Phoenix area & we stayed there (in various houses) for 9 years.  However we also purchased our land in Apache County in 1998 and started making regular camping trips.  Our land is located in a frontier community - which is even more rural than a rural community.  In my field (public health) the difference between rural and frontier is determined by the number of medical professionals per capita.  There are other ways to classify rural vs. frontier - for instance access to fresh food/grocery stores is often used.  Another classification uses population density and high geographic remoteness.  By all measures Apache County is frontier.  In 2006 we moved to the county seat of Apache County and we stayed for three and a half years.  Here is a map from the Arizona Department of Health services that shows the breakdown of urban, rural and frontier communities in AZ.  Apache County is a long slice of the Northeast part of the state.  Most of the county is Navajo Nation, but the Southern part (labeled Springerville/Eager) is off the reservation.  The whole county is considered nonmetro.  From there we moved to a rural community (Florence, AZ) for 7 years, did full-time RV'ing in urban/rural/frontier places for just over three years and then started making the transition to living at our homestead.  So here is an approximate breakdown of my time living in various settings:

• Urban: 22 years
• Rural: 18 years
• Frontier:  5 years

So, as you can see I am more of a country girl than a city slicker!  However, from the perspective of people who were born and raised in this area I am from the city.  My point: because I have had both experiences I don't really belong fully to either group.  This is valuable to me because I can pick and choose from the values of each group to knit my own identity.

So now to discuss fundamental insights I have gained from these varied experiences living and working in urban and rural environments - because the cultures are very different.  Also, because I have clearly chosen the rural life over the urban, and because most media portrayals of rural life are produced by urban dwellers I prefer to highlight the values embraced by many rural dwellers.  If you have not read "Walden" by H. D. Thoreau, I highly recommend it.  He really grasps the value of living closer to nature.  To be honest I don't think all rural folks would think of it this way - but they certainly don't want to see buildings and pavement all over the place.  We value the view, we value the animals that survive on the land.  Sure, cities are good to visit if you need to shop at a number of different places, but for the most part living near stores is not worth losing the view.  The soul can breathe in a less populated place - the facades we wear when we interact with too many people are forgotten.  People are less polished, more genuine, interesting, and have grit.   With my city co-workers I hear about their vacations to rural areas - but they are tourists - they have not lived the experience so they have not let the lessons of rural living become a part of themselves.  

Let's not forget that mere generations ago our forbearers lived with nature - how far back in your family tree do you have to go to find a farmer, rancher or other rural dweller?  For me it was my great-great grandparents.  Husband's grandfather raised cattle and commuted to the city to work in a factory.  Cities only gained popularity over the past two centuries and now a bit more than half of the world's population lives in cities. This trend raises serious questions around sustainability because the urban dwellers live in an artificial world divorced from food production, energy production, water management, housing development.  Urban residents contract out all of their basic needs (food, water, shelter, electricity) and would struggle mightily to provide for themselves.  From my observations rural residents are generally more self-reliant.

Returning to the notion of grit (and yes, I love the movie True Grit) I have learned what grit is when providing for myself - growing food, preserving and preparing food without fossil fuels, setting up a solar power plant, plumbing a solar water system, building a house.  Because services are scarce in rural areas, rural residents learn to take care of themselves.  They push through adversity, try different things & develop creative problem-solving skills.  At different times Husband and I have sought assistance with various projects but many times the best, cheapest, quickest and sure way to get something done is to do it yourself.  We all know this because we have been disappointed when services let us down - when our food is not prepared correctly at a restaurant, when a contractor does a poor job, when an installer cuts corners, or when a plumber or electrician overcharges for something we find out later was not that expensive.  Though there is a myth perpetuated by city dwellers that specialization is preferable - in reality it creates unnecessary barriers between you and your fellow man.  Where communities used to come together to build barns, we now sue contractors for not delivering on contracts.  Where kids used to roam the land we now call CPS on our neighbor for their kid being at the park unsupervised.  

In cities, governmental entities such as police, public health, & building inspectors enforce regulations enacted to make a safe environment for the community - the downside is that when the environment is engineered to protect people they end up living under the illusion that they are competent in being able to care for themselves, when in fact they are not.  Most families wouldn't have the first clue how to deal with a prolonged power or water outage.  Disruptions to food supplies in grocery stores would quickly result in lost meals because most families have no provisions and if they did they would not know how to prepare them.  Families only recently had to learn how to care for and educate their children in the absence of the public school system.  Since then the broad consensus is that the public school system must be preserved - families no longer have the ability or knowledge to care for and educate their kids for tomorrow.  

At one time I compiled a list of all the services I relied upon.  I reflected that if only one of them failed I would be utterly unable to care for myself or my children  In the Pacific Northwest the power grid is melting due to the extreme heat caused by climate change.  In the Southwest we lead the nation in wildfires and drought.  Urbanization, industrial farming, and the fossil fuel industry are largely to blame.  In rural communities the norm is conservativism - that is to conserve the way of life that has served their families for generations.  They know how to raise gardens and animals.  The communities are tight-knit and they help their neighbors.  The city is a shiny illusion affording a standard of living never seen before, but the consequences are felt across the globe and it is unsustainable.  The systems are crumbling and families don't know how to adapt when they were raised to rely on others for all of their basic needs.  We are being displaced by climate change due to flooding, drought, extreme heat or fire.  No one is immune - AZ is on fire. The smoke pollutes our air and further dries out the forests.  Deforestation has promoted drought conditions.  Where is the political will to re-green the overgrazed drought-stricken lands

The value of self-reliance is something urban dwellers can learn from their rural neighbors.  Despite the doom and gloom we can each seek to develop our own self-reliance in many different ways.  We can form closer bonds with our communities to make systemic, grassroots changes.  We can consider whether our choices are sustainable.  If our kids are not going to be able to live the lifestyle offered in the city then we can move to the country and start digging our hands in the dirt.  With this said, it is true that rural areas suffer from "brain drain" seeing their best and brightest leave for college and not returning.  I would argue that rural areas offer excellent opportunities for career advancement.  Often vital positions requiring college degrees can go many months or a year without being filled.  People living in rural areas do have a deep distrust of government - which may be understandable on multiple levels.  First local leaders are often underqualified for their positions (due to brain drain) and secondly, there are many examples of  how government systems have failed or are not addressing the lived experiences of residents due to identity politics.  Finally rural residents have been left behind in terms of infrastructure (roads, water systems & cell towers), internet services, medical services, and other social safety net programs when unemployment rates are high.  If elected leaders want to actually help people instead of seeking power and glory for themselves they can start by addressing the concerns of residents.  Since that is unlikely to happen any time soon we have to turn to ourselves and to each other to find solutions in these apocalyptic times.  

My approach has been to pursue self-reliance - to live within my means, eliminate debt, value the things I own & put them to use or sell/donate them to minimize and simplify, raise and educate my kids over the past few years, grow food, find peace in nature, lessen my own consumerism, manage our household power consumption (we use between 5-8 kwh per day), manage our water system (we use an average of 50-75 gallons of water each day for our family of 4), and overall live in a more sustainable way.  These were not easy choices, but today when I see blackouts on the rise due to climate events and drought getting worse I am glad we made these choices.  I am also most thankful for the 'get 'er done' attitude I have learned from my rural neighbors as I have learned how to be more self-reliant.  

On the road again...summer trip 2021

This year we took a 2 month RV trip to Michigan to visit our childhood stomping grounds and connect with family.  It took us about a week to drive from AZ to MI.  We alternated between boondocking and paying for full-hook up campgrounds while on the road.  We did have one little snag on the drive - one of our windows shattered!  We have no idea why.  I went in to open the windows after we stopped for the evening and it broke into a million pieces.  We had to figure out a solution that would work...this is what the "patch" looks like.  We were lucky this happened on the first day of the trip.  We were able to stop near our homestead, run out to the land to get tools and parts and complete the repair in one evening.  We didn't have to buy anything - we accomplished this with things we had laying around at the homestead.  This paneling worked well as replacement window for the drive to Michigan, for our entire stay, and for the drive back.  We have yet to schedule a time for a new window to be installed.  We did add some duck tape around the molding to ensure the water didn't settle into the window track.  This kept the panel board from getting wet where it would swell.  

Our primary destination was the Hideaway RV Park in Grass Lake, MI .  We had a reservation for a month.  It was a lovely place to stay (although it started out rather cool and wet).  My parents, siblings, nieces and nephews all live in the area. We were able to visit with various families each day.  The nieces and nephews were still in school and my siblings were working, so we met for dinners and had some fun gatherings on the weekends.  The campground has a pond for swimming and paddleboats - we enjoyed both.    

There were a number of personal reasons why we stayed in Michigan and didn't do any National Park sight-seeing this year.  I mentioned in a previous post that my grandma passed away in November - in addition to collecting items handed down to me, I assisted with an estate sale.  Secondly, and more importantly, my mom was diagnosed with cancer in April  - weeks of testing followed to determine the stage.  On the day we arrive we learned that it is stage IV and had spread from the initial site.  I was present for the first five weeks of her initial six week treatment of radiation and chemotherapy.  As I write she is on a week break from treatment and will soon begin a four-month chemo regime where she will receive treatment every other week.  At the end of those four months more tests will be completed to see how the cancer responded to the treatment in order to determine next steps.  I am glad I was able to be present during her initial treatment.  

We were also able to connect with Husband's family.  His parents passed away years ago, but his nephews live in the state and we were able to meet up with them one afternoon for a very nice visit.  We also took our kids to Frankenmuth, MI and Bronner's (trip down memory lane for the two of us).

We decided to extend our initial one-month visit by a couple of weeks.  We stayed at the Somerset Beach Campground for five nights.  This is where my parents full-time RV and we have stayed at this location in the past.  The sites have electric only.  You can run a hose from the bib to fill your RV tank.  There is no on-site sewer - you have to schedule a pump dump or move to the dump station.  The public restrooms and showers are very nice and allowed us to stretch one tank of fresh water for our entire stay.  

Our last week was spent at Camp Turkeyville - my parents moved here to better accommodate my mom's treatment and so we followed.  This place was expensive, but had some nice amenities (pools & restaurant were most appreciated).  Yes, there are turkeys and the restaurant serves a variety of turkey dishes.

The grounds are beautiful, the weather was nice, and the kids and their cousins all got to do a lot of swimming in the two pools!

We were parked across the road from my parents which was very nice.

We stayed a week and were turkey'ed out! Gobble gobble

We left Michigan on June 8th.  It took almost a week to get back to Mesa, AZ.  On the way back west the heat was intense so we paid for full-hook up sites every night except the first.  When we got back to our site in Mesa, we set up the RV for our next visit to the area.  The heatwave in AZ was in full force so we were anxious to pack up all of our stuff into our smaller cargo trailer and head back to the mountains.  We were away from our homestead for a full 8 weeks in total.  Thankfully we installed security cameras and were able to check in on the place frequently from the road and from Michigan.  It's been very good to be back - travel is exhausting!